Hello, my name is Jen. I’m 53 yrs old and back in Nov. of 2018 my boyfriend was diagnosed with lung cancer. Within a week from his diagnosis my mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. By late January of 2019 my boyfriend lost his battle and a week later my mom lost her battle as well with cancer. I was devastated, they were such a huge part of my daily life. I took their deaths very hard, pretty much shut down. I cried daily it was so painful I was a mess. After a few months by March-April I kept hearing “pray”, this kept happening, it kept coming up in my mind. Just a quick background, I never prayed before, I grew up in a family whom was not religious at all. I believed in God and Jesus and would always watch the shows around Easter time about Jesus. I would weep a lot when they would crucify Him on the cross but I never knew what it was all about. So back to me hearing “pray”, I didn’t actually hear an audible voice it would keep coming to my thought daily. By May I wasn’t getting any better, matter fact I was getting worse, the grief was consuming me. I missed them both so much and was crying one night and this time I heard “pray to God, He is your only hope”. So I got down on my knees and I asked God to please help me, take this heartache away. The next day literally, I was going through the channels on TV and stopped at Jimmy Swaggart channel. I don’t know why I stopped on that channel but they were talking about Jesus. I was about to flick the channel and I again heard “listen”. So I did, and they were explaining about how Jesus died for our sins, I had never heard this before! I didn’t even know I was a sinner. I knew nothing! I listened to the entire program and was crying, then Jimmy said about accepting Jesus as my Savior and pray for forgiveness of sins. Confess Jesus is Lord, I did. I cried more then I have ever cried in my life, I was so broken, lost and so very sorry for all the terrible things I had done throughout my life. When I woke the next day, I was different, everything around me was different. I realized after a few hrs I was not grieving, and everything seemed alive. I looked out the window and saw a bird, and I heard “God’s wonderful creation” I was mesmerized at it’s beauty, every feather was so clear I could practically count them. The leaves, the grass, everything I looked at was alive and all for the Glory of God. Even the colors were brighter. This lasted most of the day then it faded but I knew it was from God. He knows how much I love nature and all living creatures so He showed me His beauty and how everything was created by him. I continue to learn and grow in the Lord and He has led me to all the correct bible believing preachers. I know now that God used the timing of my mom and boyfriend passing away as a means to my salvation. I have no doubt about it! What we see as painful or hard God is working it for the good. Jesus saved me, I’m so grateful, He has washed me clean of my filthy sins and gave me eternal life. I knew of Jesus but I never knew Jesus…big difference! Listen to that voice that keeps at you, it’s the Holy Spirit, which I had never heard of until after I learned about Him. That is my testimony, all Glory to God!! Amen